This week on Dear Annie Joy, we’re diving into one of the hardest things for recovering people pleasers and boundary beginners—what to do when you say no and someone is clearly disappointed in you.
I know that ache. I’ve seen the face drop. I’ve heard the “oh… okay” that’s loaded with silent judgment. And I’ve felt the sick-to-my-stomach guilt that creeps in when my no isn’t met with grace.
So in today’s episode, we’re talking through:
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Why saying no can feel so physically uncomfortable
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How to tell the difference between guilt and actual remorse
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The old internal rules we’ve been living by (like “don’t rock the boat” or “don’t disappoint anyone”)—and why they need to go
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What true belonging actually looks like (hint: it includes room for your no)
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Seven powerful steps to support yourself when someone doesn’t take your boundary well
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And how to decode what their reaction reveals about the relationship
This is for the woman who is tired of self-abandoning just to keep the peace. It’s for the tender-hearted leader learning to trust her own capacity. And it’s for anyone who’s ever walked away from a conversation replaying every word and wondering, “Was I too much? Was I not enough?”
Friend, you’re not mean. You’re just not available for self-abandonment anymore.
So come sit with me—let’s name the hard, hold space for the tender, and anchor ourselves in truth. Because peace is worth protecting. And your no is holy ground.
🎧 Plus, I’m sharing some playful phrases you can keep in your back pocket when your “no” needs a little sparkle or sass.
Let’s stop shrinking to keep others comfortable. The world can adjust to your no—you don’t have to adjust to their disappointment.
If this episode spoke to you, will you leave a review? It helps other heart-heavy women find the show. Thank you for being here. I love you big time!